do you know that feeling of feeling lonely? that your presence seems to disrupt the flow of life? when you’re confused of your own feelings because you know you don’t hold any meaning to someone… the feeling of losing yourself because all the sadness and insecurity that you suppressed and accumulated for the longest time snapped and came back to you at once. The walls you build decided to collapse, buried under the burden and further hiding yourself. The person you thought could bring you happiness is the one you distrust the most and for the ones that care, you feel like a burden. at the same time, you don’t want to let go because if that sliver of hope in my heart. how ironic when I feel I lost all my hope, wanting you to truly accept who I am, to lift me up, to tell me that everything will be okay because you’re here for me. Instead, you out-rightly tell me I’m a burden..or I just want someone to listen to me…but you coldly disregard everything and describe things that aren’t important. Being less than a friend to someone…. and cast away or pushed away to become someone’s backdoor. I’m suffocating…I can’t do this anymore.
Does anyone ever get that feeling in your chest like when something sad happens like you can physically feel the pain and you feel your throat becoming thick and your words get caught and you cant really talk and you feel like crying but you cant and it just hurts
everything that I suppressed in my heart poured out and the tears flowed as raw as before.